Eddie Bell
In my life there have been two people whom I’ve been proud to call my best friend. Neither made it past their mid70s and that makes me feel unworthy, almost a fraud.
Eddie Bell died yesterday, a great man, a unique human being who lived a life that was, well, larger than most.
He and I were born in neighbouring towns. We might even have been kin, for my mother’s family name was Bell, and my ancestors travelled from Colonsay two hundred years ago to work in the steel mills, as I believe his did to.
My uncle knew his older brother and yet he and I would probably never have met, had it not been orchestrated by a Spanish friend who knew nothing of this connection but put us at adjoining tables in his restaurant simply because I was a writer and he was a publisher. We hit it off, I became one of the first clients of his new agency, Michael Dobbs being the other, and our lives were linked from then on.
The last time we met was in June, in that same restaurant, when he told me of his diagnosis. I tried to be as encouraging as I could, and stayed positive for as long as I could but life can be, as they say, a real bastard.
Eddie’s obituaries are being written even now. This isn’t one. It’s a tribute to a man who lived an extraordinary, unimaginable life, enjoyed and embraced it in every way, and who will be missed more than even he could have imagined,
In print
I am pleased to announce that in preparation for the launch of next month’s mass market edition of Dead Man’s Tale, two of my non-Skinner works are now available on Amazon in printed form.
‘Somewhere Over the Rainbow’ is a lighthearted step back in time to the days when UK politics were fun, far from the character free zone that it has become. It even has a series of happy endings.
‘Resurrection Man’ is for those who have spent the last twenty years wondering what really happened to Oz Blackstone. For those who don’t know Oz, lad about town turned movie star turned psychopath, his nine adventures are out there in all formats, in bookstores, online and directly from Headline. For those who do and miss him, ‘Resurrection Man’ holds the answers, five short first person stories, blended together in a novel.
Both are available on Amazon, the world’s biggest bookstore, in ebook and now finally in printed form.
Go for it!
One for the Christmas list
I don’t plug books very often, but I am happy to make an exception for Changin’ Times, by my friend Sue McDonald, a coming of age novel set in ‘60s Edinburgh, a work that will appeal to women who grew up around that era and lived through a period of very significant change as the old order and attitudes gave way to new opportunities and constraints fell away.
Maybe I’ll write a companion piece about 60s Glasgow, but do not hold your breath. It wouldn’t be as charming as Sue’s.
Be afraid
www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2025/09/27/trump-military-portland-ice/
No names, but I have heard of a US-born citizen, whose American parents are British by birth, who is taking steps to obtain a UK passport.
He won’t be alone.
Puzzled
Having just contributed as a British taxpayer to the considerable cost of an unprecedented second State Visit by President Trump, I feel that I have some excuse for breaking my personal prohibition on commenting on the politics of another nation.
It seems that by common consent Trump creates and curates great golf courses. But I doubt that connects to the slogan that headlines his campaigns. And that’s where my curiosity and this question lie:
What does Make America Great Again actually mean?
Not a word but,
What is a word you feel that too many people use?
@
Sneaky bastards.
How many slices are there in a standard Warburton Loaf?
14
How many slices are there in a Tesco loaf?
13
Think about it.
See you, Jimmy.
I have an Audible account. Indeed I have 50+ titles on Audible. But I have one problem with it, and this is it.
If you can’t do a Scottish accent, don’t do a Scottish accent!
Fix you!
Maybe it’s wrong but I am sorry for these people. What’s happened to them is the internet equivalent of stoning to death. Any company that would rush to judgment in this way should not be trusted.
EffOfcom
Anyone watching the Open has week must have been struck by the number of apologies by commentators for any ‘bad language that may have come through our microphones’.
At the height of battle on Sunday, only Scheffler seemed to be an Eff Word free zone, but a week before at the Scottish Open he was no angel either when the greens didn’t behave as he expected.
Not only golf either: a couple of apologies were offered during the Lions game today, the Indian captain turned the air blue at Lords last week and as for football, we won’t even go there.
I admit that I thought it was farcical. People know that many golfers swear when they find rough and bunkers. Often all the apologies do is draw their attention to something they may not have heard in the first place.
It wasn’t until a couple weeks ago that I discovered there’s a reason for it. Listening to,Chris Evans one morning I heard one of his guests refer to something as ‘batshit crazy’. He laughed out loud then apologised to her first having to apologise for her.
‘I have to,’ he said. ‘It’s an OfCom requirement.’
So now you know.
Attention!
www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cwyg0ly2ld8o
I took my wife Edinburgh Airport two weeks ago. She had to check bags so I went with her. With one thing and another I was in the car park for an hour and a quarter.
£24.
Airports are in a monopoly situation. They should not be allowed to abuse it.
No way
news.sky.com/story/politics-latest-starmer-small-boat-crossings-macron-state-visit-the-king-12593360
Sod that for a game of soldiers. If anything the voting age should be raised.
RIP Chairman
To all the self-righteous fannies abusing Norman Tebbit on the socials today, a hearty up yours. He spoke his mind, he endured unimaginable suffering and he looked after his crippled wife for the rest of her days.
Put a quiff on him
This evening I began a new project. I am going to re watch every series of The Thick of It, the TV satire milestone for which Armando Iannucci was proclaimed a genius.
I don’t know if I can go along with that. To me, it’s a documentary. I worked in that environment for 15 years and I can testify that it’s all absolutely true.
Spirit in the sky
I’m not quite a lifelong user of the NHS. I was three when it was set up but I have been a patient of the same practice in Gullane for 54 years. For the first 50 of those, if I needed to see a doctor I went to the surgery, morning or afternoon, clocked in and waited, for a couple of hours if necessary.
This morning I called, and asked for a routine, non-urgent appointment.
I can be seen on July 14, the receptionist advised me. Four weeks.
But that’s not all; if I have more than one complaint, I will need to book a second appointment. The alternative is to call again tomorrow at 8am sharp, in the hope that I will be answered before the limited number of short notice spots are filled up. I suggest that instead they assign a lottery ticket to each caller and then have a draw when all the spots have been requested. It would probably be a fairer system.
I have no idea how many patients are on the practice list but it must be in the thousands. I do know that seven GPs, one man and sux women, are listed among its complement of twenty-two staff: They work for a total of eighteen days per week. They need more, now.
Having a laugh
Someone I know very well has received a letter from DWP, advising that as he is about to hit 80, his State Pension will be increased by 25p a week. No kidding, 25 whole p. I bought a bottle of water on a flight last night. My friend would have needed to save his increase for a year to pay for it.
Given that the average UK life expectancy is 80, statistically it doesn’t actually cost anything. Nevertheless within DWP there is a branch, with a manager, (he signed the letter) employed to advise the lucky winners of their good fortune. Seems to me it would be cheaper just to give the over-80s an extra fiver week without bothering to tell them.
Scratch cards?
Big shout out to the Ryanair cabin crew on last night’s Barcelona Edinburgh service. It was a rough flight, seat belts most of the way but they were calm and helpful, without being helped themselves by the pilots who maintained radio silence all the way.