Quintin Jardine's blog

Twenty odd years ago I was in the gents in the Bellagio in Las Vegas where the urinals are tall and traditional. An American guy was a couple of units away from mine. He had his dick in one hand, his phone in the other, and he was having a loud conversation. ‘Hi, I’m at the World of Concrete Congress.’ I remember thinking that there could be no finer venue, Vegas being built entirely of the stuff. However the fact that made the event stand out was this: he had made the call. Was his diary that full?

From that day on I had regarded this as unbeatably odd lavvy behaviour: until a couple of hours ago when I had occasion to use the facilities in M&S. These contrast greatly with the Bellagio. There, three initials are jammed into an unpartitioned shoulder rubbing space that is really only big enough for two and a half, and today the one on the right was out of use. The one on the left was in use, by a guy who is absolutely the new world record holder.

He was texting.