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De Niro is right
Your guide to chortling gleefully at the Trump recession | The Daily Mash
— Read on www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/international/your-guide-to-chortling-gleefully-at-the-trump-recession-20250311255467
Reasonable question
Does President Trump actually know what he’s doing? He seems to be injecting bleach into the US economy.
Potty
Watching Stephen Kinnock, an English/Welsh Health Minister, this morning, it occurred to me that it’s time Labour stopped blaming previous Tory governments for all the country’s ills. This morning it was children’s dental health.
To be politically incorrect, if kids go to school not knowing how to brush their teeth properly, that’s not the fault of Rishi Sunak, Boris, Theresa or anyone else. It’s the fault of their parents, clear as daylight seen through Keir Starmer’s expensive specs.
In shovelling all the shit they can into Kemi Badenough’s front garden the government is hiding from the electorate a very obvious truth. The Tories’ years in power might have been curtailed if Labour had offered an acceptable alternative. But they didn’t. First they were led by Ed Miliband, the less able of two uninspiring brothers, then they took a lurch to the far left, and to the utterly unelectable Corbyn.
It was only when common sense took over and they moved back into Tony Blair territory that they recovered government potential. Even then Starmer would have nothing like the majority he enjoys had it not been for the unexpected intervention of Nigel Starmer.
So my message is, stop deflecting, for it’s your fault too. If you’re that good, go on and fix it.
Geoffrey?
In 15 minutes the England cricket team (such as it is 😉) will take the field against Afghanistan. There has been a debate about the game given the persecution of women in that country. The general view seems to be that a boycott would do nothing to help them, therefore it will go ahead.
But here’s a thought. If England brought in a couple of players from its women’s squad, wouldn’t that send a very clear message to the Taliban? (I doubt that it would weaken the side.)
Thought for the day
How would it play if every nation on Trumsk’s hit list, ie all of them apart from Israel (because of its unique development opportunities), slapped a minimum 100% tariff on Tesla cars?
Would the special relationship survive that?
🥜
I see Zuckerberg and Musk standing close together. I wonder if they’re will be fisticuffs in the car park afterwards.
Sir Keir is watching you
After the latest update Microsoft Word users will have noticed a new tool. It’s called Copilot, and its purpose is to produce a draft document covering pretty much anything that it’s told to do.
I promise you right now that I will never go near it. Apart from it being dishonest, it would also be pointless. They can tweak it all they like but they will never teach the bugger to think like me.
However Keir Starmer loves it. In his eyes, as he explained this week, Artificial Intelligence is a gateway to the bravest of new world and is a field in which the UIK will be a world leader.
Izzat so, Prime Minister? Maybe you’ve used it already.
I took it for a test drive this afternoon. I asked it to write an election manifesto for the British Labour Party. In less that 30 seconds, I kid you not, it came up with the following:
Labour Party Election Manifesto
For a Fairer, Greener, and Brighter Future
Introduction
The Labour Party is committed to building a fairer, greener, and brighter future for all citizens of the United Kingdom. Our vision is rooted in the principles of social justice, economic equality, and environmental sustainability. We believe that by working together, we can create a society where everyone has the opportunity to thrive, irrespective of their background or circumstances.
Economy and Jobs
Building a Stronger Economy
• Invest in infrastructure projects to create jobs and stimulate economic growth.
• Support small and medium enterprises (SMEs) with grants and low-interest loans.
• Implement a fair tax system where the wealthiest pay their fair share.
• Raise the minimum wage to ensure a living wage for all workers.
Creating Quality Jobs
• Invest in green industries and renewable energy to create sustainable jobs.
• Promote vocational training and apprenticeships to equip young people with the skills they need.
• Support workers’ rights to unionize and bargain collectively.
• Ensure equal pay for equal work and eliminate gender pay gaps.
Education
Investing in Our Future
• Increase funding for public schools to ensure that all children receive a high-quality education.
• Reduce class sizes to provide more personalized attention to students.
• Expand access to early childhood education and childcare services.
• Make higher education accessible and affordable for all by reducing tuition fees and increasing scholarships.
Empowering Teachers
• Provide competitive salaries and professional development opportunities for teachers.
• Ensure that teachers have the resources and support they need to succeed in the classroom.
• Promote a curriculum that fosters critical thinking, creativity, and practical skills.
Healthcare
Protecting the NHS
• Increase funding for the National Health Service (NHS) to ensure timely access to healthcare for all.
• Reduce waiting times for surgeries, treatments, and consultations.
• Invest in mental health services to provide comprehensive care for all citizens.
• Ensure that healthcare professionals receive competitive salaries and adequate working conditions.
Improving Public Health
• Promote preventive care and healthy lifestyle choices to reduce the burden of chronic diseases.
• Expand access to addiction treatment and support services.
• Ensure that all citizens have access to affordable prescription medications.
• Enhance support for caregivers and family members who provide care to loved ones.
Environment
Tackling Climate Change
• Commit to achieving net-zero carbon emissions by 2050.
• Invest in renewable energy sources such as wind, solar, and hydroelectric power.
• Promote energy efficiency and conservation in homes, businesses, and public buildings.
• Support sustainable agriculture and protect natural habitats and biodiversity.
Building a Green Economy
• Invest in green technologies and innovation to drive economic growth.
• Create green jobs and support workers transitioning from traditional industries.
• Promote public transportation and sustainable urban planning to reduce carbon footprints.
• Encourage recycling, waste reduction, and the circular economy.
Social Justice
Fighting Inequality
• Implement policies to reduce poverty and support vulnerable populations.
• Promote affordable housing and address homelessness through comprehensive programs.
• Ensure that social security and welfare benefits provide adequate support for those in need.
• Advance gender equality and support initiatives to combat discrimination and violence against women.
Promoting Inclusivity
• Support policies that promote diversity and inclusion in workplaces and communities.
• Protect the rights of LGBTQ+ individuals and promote equality for all, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.
• Foster positive relations between different cultural, ethnic, and religious groups.
• Ensure that people with disabilities have access to the services and opportunities they need to live fulfilling lives.
Housing and Infrastructure
Building Affordable Homes
• Invest in the construction of affordable housing to meet the needs of all citizens.
• Implement rent control measures to prevent exploitation by landlords.
• Support first-time homebuyers with grants and low-interest loans.
• Ensure that all housing developments are environmentally sustainable and energy-efficient.
Improving Infrastructure
• Invest in the modernization of public transportation systems.
• Upgrade and maintain essential infrastructure, including roads, bridges, and public utilities.
• Expand access to high-speed internet and digital services across the country.
• Implement smart city initiatives to enhance urban living and reduce environmental impacts.
Foreign Policy
Promoting Peace and Stability
• Support diplomatic efforts to resolve conflicts and promote global peace.
• Commit to international cooperation on issues such as climate change, trade, and security.
• Provide humanitarian aid to countries affected by disasters and conflicts.
• Uphold human rights and promote democracy worldwide.
Strengthening International Relations
• Foster strong relationships with our European neighbours and other global allies.
• Promote fair trade policies that protect workers’ rights and environmental standards.
• Support international development initiatives that address poverty and inequality.
• Engage with global institutions to collaborate on shared challenges and opportunities.
Conclusion
The Labour Party is dedicated to creating a better future for all citizens of the United Kingdom. Our manifesto outlines a comprehensive plan to build a fairer, greener, and more prosperous society. We believe that by working together, we can achieve our shared goals and ensure a brighter future for generations to come. We invite you to join us in this journey and support our vision for a better tomorrow.
Thank you for your support.
The Labour Party
Without a paddle
Anyone in doubt about the precise location of shit creek only needs to put a tracker on Rachel Reeves’ phone.
A wheel too far
A tour guide told me today that Copenhagen is on course to meet its net carbon neutrality target by next year. If its cycle friendly policy is a by product they can stick it where the sun doesn’t shine.
Let’s have a pedestrian friendly policy first. In the Danish capital I feel much more at risk from bikes than cars.
Football-speak?
Lifted from BBC News on line:
‘The Aberdeen fan apologised last week in a ministerial statement and conceded he should have went to a “wider range” of football matches.’
Doomsday
I began my working life sixty years ago, as a journalist. I wasn’t very good at it, but I was lucky enough to make the jump from poacher to gamekeeper, where I was more comfortable and successful.
Nevertheless I still think like a journalist. My values are based on those of the sixties, before the rising of the Sun when most newspapers were broadsheet rather than tabloid and truth, as viewed from either side of the fence, was valued above all else.
This morning, I am saddened by what I am reading. Specifically, a Daily Mail report touching on two broadcast incidents. In one, Tom Bradby, a respected broadcaster, is accused of calling Donald Trump a fascist during ITV’s election coverage. He didn’t. He quoted named people who had worked in the first Trump administration, and had used that term. Not only does the Mail distort his words, it portrays him as leading ‘the British liberal meltdown.’
In a subsequent section it refers to Emily Maitlis ‘mysteriously’ leaving C4 coverage, after being rebuked for swearing by her co-host. She didn’t … she attributed the term ‘batshit’ to others … and she wasn’t. She left the studio to record part of a podcast and resumed her role later.
The Nationalist, a fortunately little read publication, went further. It reported that she had been ‘pulled off’ coverage, a total misrepresentation, or to put it another way, a lie.
I know, we live in a different era. Today’s media has evolved beyond what was imaginable even thirty years ago. But surely standards shouldn’t have evolved with it. Surely truth should have remained truth, and respect should be constant.
But it hasn’t. I am now officially a dinosaur. 🦕 My worry is that there is another meteorite on the way. It may hit after I have gone, but it will swallow those I love and who remain.
Here’s what I see as today’s truth. The greatest threat to our society isn’t Trump, or Putin, or crazy Kim. It’s ourselves.
Whoops, they’ve done it again!
Need I say more?
Hey Rachel
Chancellor-speak. 2024 – 2028 = ‘a couple of years.’
Sorry, it’s four.
Barnstormer
Watching Rishi respond to the Budget I am wondering why he’s kept his best ever Parliamentary performance for his swansong.
Will Kemi or what’s his name be an improvement? No way
Duplicitous
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c1jrld1kjp3t
When I joined the Tory staff in 1980, colleagues had Reagan/Bush bumper stickers on their staff cars. Some had been, or were in the US campaigning. Trump must know that.
RIP Chairman
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cp39q43976po
When I joined the Scottish Conservative Party in 1980, as its press officer, Michael Ancram was its chairman. I was 34, and so was he, a week younger than me. He smiled his way through the interview, because that’s how he was; an aristocrat, yes, a man of influence, yes, but without any side to him. He wasn’t simply a chair, he was a leader whom his entire staff, the Scottish backbenchers and most of the voluntary side, were happy to follow. He didn’t simply talk the talk. He put it on the line when he had to. At that time, the hot issue in Scotland was the future of the steel strip mill, Ravenscraig, in Motherwell, my home town. London would have pulled the plug on it in heartbeat but we had an election to fight in 1983. The STUC held a rally in protest against the feared closure. Michael went along; I was with him. We listened to the speeches, the fire, the brimstone; they had a case, in the short term at least. Michael whispered to me, ‘I’m going to do it.’ He stood up, was invited to speak, walked to the podium, and pledged his support and that of the Scottish party, to saving the plant. He put his job on the line, but he kept it. We went into the 1983 General Election with 21 Scottish seats, and we came out with 21. We knew that was a phenomenal resulting that climate, but it wasn’t good enough for Maggie, who had spent a total of 18 hours in Scotland in the entire campaign, and consequently knew as little about it as clearly she cared. Yes, she gave Michael a job in government in the aftermath, but on the lowest rung of the ladder, Parliamentary Under-secretary of State. Those of us who had worked for and with him saw that as an insult. Looking back, I believe was her way of controlling someone she knew would never be a yes man. Or maybe she was getting even for Ravenscraig.
Four years later, Michael lost his Edinburgh seat, which had always been marginal. By that time, I was out of politics and a director of a corporate communications firm in Edinburgh. I persuaded my colleagues that we had a need for the right non-executive director. They agreed, he and I had lunch, and he joined our board. Not long afterwards, he became our chairman too.
In 1992 politics called him back, inevitably, to a safe seat in England, a different Prime Minister, a proper job, and the respect his talent deserved, although not quite enough to see him win the leadership in 2001, when his colleagues made the mistake of choosing Ian Duncan Smith. Michael gave a lot to his country and he could have given a lot more.
My deepest sympathy to Jane, and to his family.
Duplicity
Enough about the black hole, Sir Keir. You and your Chancellor chose to give the winter fuel payments to train drivers and doctors,
Great expectations?
In common with many among the 80% of the electorate who did not vote for the incumbent administration, I was and still am prepared to give the Labour government time to fulfil its lavish promises before taking to the streets.
In common with what I suspect to be the majority of the population I did not actually need the Winter Fuel Allowance. However I did expect honesty and common sense in addressing the problems that we face as a nation.
So far all I am seeing is finger pointing and much of what I am hearing is bullshit. The so-called ‘black hole’ is unsubstantiated. The claim that winter fuel payments would have bankrupted the nation is manifestly untrue.
This morning the PM is addressing the NHS. He has been rabbiting on about ‘fixing the plumbing before turning on the taps.’ (Keir, lawyers can’t do metaphor.) He says that his administration will produce a ten year plan by next Spring, begging the question, ‘Why didn’t you produce it during your 14 years in Opposition?’
There is another health service. It’s provided by private insurers, and it’s accessible to those who can afford it. Many people have it as part of their employment package. Problems with that, it costs employers in national insurance, and employees through income tax.
Radical it may be, but if those who could afford to opt out of some or even all of NHS provision were incentivised to do so, would it ease current pressures and improve the service for those who can’t? Is anyone in government even looking at that?
Don’t be so sure.
A forecast that I read this morning: ‘Pointing to a ConservativeHome pollwhich shows Mrs Badenoch beating all other candidates among Tory activists, the source added: “She is clearly the favourite with the members, and MPs will want to make sure that the members’ favourite is in the final two.”’
Oh yes? I might hope that MPs might be smart enough to remember that Liz Truss was the members’ favourite, and before her, Boris.
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